thankful 2010

I barely know where to begin this lengthy list of thanks. As usual I shall recount the blessings of this past year, and as usual it will sound like a summary akin to those I write each New Year's Eve about the eventful things that have occurred since the last. I will try to tailor each point to reach some sort of gratitude without sounding trite. Though to be frank, how many ways can I express my thanks?

Each year I breathe a sigh of relief that my family has yet again, miraculously escaped incurable, chronic illness that seems imminent and looming on the horizon. Knock on wood a million times over but this is my self-protective mechanism at work. I am thankful that my grandparents are watched over by my dutiful doctor of an uncle, and that my relatives remain healthy. I am glad that my greatest fears have not materialized and I pray that they stay away indefinitely.

I am thankful that the new year brought with it meaningful employment. Despite the stress, the fear, and the discomfort, I was truly blessed to have encountered such a tight-knit organization that emphasized compassion and communication. Daily expressions of appreciation and working in Berkeley continue to impact me today. Plus it was nice to have disposable income for a short while.

Having to commute gave me a fantastic excuse to move away from home, something I realize I desperately needed to do. Moving home after graduation was nice and comfortable, but I soon saw myself becoming stagnant and lacking incentive to grow and explore the world I had previously been so curious about. I am ever thankful to have found housing with two incredible individuals (A+T) who easily welcomed me and continue to enlighten and entertain me.

Living away allowed me to spend my summer pursuing my dreams of love and medical school. As the school year drew to a close and medical school deadlines drew near, I channeled my energy and resolved to devote my free time to writing essays convincing admissions committees that my passion for medicine is true. Before I become too mushy, I must account for A, my anchor through the tenuous first moments of the application process. If not for A, I would have been overwhelmed, timid, and in over my head. Not only was he full of information, his hard work ethic (though sometimes a bit crazed) drove me to try harder and put in more effort than I would have, alone. The friendship we formed was deep and I believe we are both better people with this connection we share.

Back to love. As the lucky stars would have it, my burgeoning crush found an opportune moment to spark into something more. Time and space collided and I soon found myself falling, falling like I never have before. I am thankful to have found someone who, among other wonderful attributes, shares my love of food, books and beauty. Several times each day I realize I am smiling to myself like a fool, thinking about how lucky I am to receive the affections of a caring, supportive, and did I mention handsome?, boyfriend. He is such a big source of happiness in my life and I am grateful every minute.

Fall came with it the promise of opportunities waiting to be seized. While little is set in stone, one thing is certain: I have achieved my grand goal of being accepted into medical school. It is still a bit surreal, and I imagine it will not sink in for quite some time. After all, I have actively prevented myself from allowing my mind to entertain such fantasies for years. Opening the seal will be a long and gentle process. I still doubt my capacity to succeed in life and become a proper adult, but this is one huge step towards a promising future and for this chance I am extremely humbled and thankful.

This is the year of uncertainty, I originally asserted. And uncertain it was, for so long. Uncertainty is one of the hardest things we have to deal with as humans, and I am most thankful for the endless support through not knowing, through my bouts of self-doubt, through my dark moments. If not for the love and cheer from my friends and family, I would not have had the strength to persevere.

My friends have been my rock, my everything for half of my life. I think that one day, I won't remember what life was like before them. Real laughter seems to only have begun when I found my sisters from other mothers. I am proud of each and every one of them for growing into the beautiful people they were always destined to become, and I am even prouder to be their confidant and their friend. When I had a dilemma, whether it was runny eyeliner on a date or troubles at work, I knew I could count on any of them to console me and laugh at the ridiculousness of the situations I found myself in.

To know each one of my friends is to experience something special and I have SIX(!) beautiful souls to interact with on a daily basis! I am thankful that we had this year to grow even closer, to eat and drink to our hearts' content, to dance dance dance dance, to take part in each others' celebrations of life and successes, and so much more. People hope for one good friend in one lifetime. I am thankful to have gotten such a good hand to play with in this game of life.